Black Ghost

8/10 looks intense.

7/10

7/10, a bit weird, but I like it!

8/10 Pretty funny

Oh, thanks for the comments, and her name isn't M.I Polly :lol: . It was my fault for not making it clear that M.I was the engraving, so I fixed ...

Polly pulled the window curtains aside ever so slightly. Through the window of the next house, she could see Mrs. Durmont sipping tea with some friends. Some community meeting, no ...

Part Three “Help my daughter,” breathed Crystal, on her knees. “Stand, my child,” said Coventina, hovering a few inches above the ground near Crystal. “My services are yours.” Trembling, C

This piece had a nice fluidity to it, and your style is very good, it keeps the reader interested. But the only thing I noticed is that you used a ...

Hi! Welcome to YWS! *magic* This will mean good luck for you on your future adventures here. Or something... Anyway, have a good time! -Tony

Prologue __________ Dear Robert, I've heard quite a lot about you and your detective work. In fact, I've even taken the liberty of interviewing some of your past clients. From ...

7/10 Nice stare.

Okay, first of all, NO ONE can take away your writing. If you want to write, then write, it doesn't matter what anyone else says. Second of all, this is ...

8/10

Ooh, Aslan, me like...7/10

…ah, all right I don't know if it matters at all, but maybe you should just capitalize the first "a". I know it's not the beginning of sentence, but it's ...